Success Saturday: At the End of an Interesting Week

The week of June 5-11 was a successful and an unsuccessful week. I succeeded in posting several of my mother's poem to her book of poetry. I have two more to post and then I have to start cleaning out the other two drawers of my desk. I don't know if I will find any more of Mom's poems. I don't know if I will find the item I'm looking for because I suspect it isn't  in the desk. 

I'm not sure where I put the item when I put it in a place I knew I could find it. All right, I know better than to put anything away where I'm sure I can find it because I usually can't find what I'm looking for where I think I put it. Does that make any sense? I hope it makes sense, but at this point I'm not sure. At this point I would be happy to find anything with the number I'm looking for on it. 

I'm not making any sense in this entry. I think the only reason I'm writing anything is because I'm depressed. I should say I was depressed because I can't help but smile at what I'm writing. I suppose if I make myself smile that is a good thing. An entry that makes me smile can be considered a successful entry. I'm going to post this now and get on with something else. 

Learning to Dance: A Writer's Thoughts on Moving

True ease in writing comes from art, not chance,

as those who move easiest have learned to dance.

Alexander Pope

Apparently I am having a little trouble learning to dance. I found both of my grammar books when I was packing stuff to move, but now that I am in my new apartment I have "lost" them again. I know they are here somewhere because I saw them when I moved the first two loads of stuff in on Monday or Tuesday. However, now that I have gotten everything in I have lost them again.

I thought I took them out of the box and put them where I could see them. Since I brought the last load in yesterday, I have look and they are not where I  thought  I placed them. Therefore, they must be under something, but I cannot  figure out  what. I know I will eventually find them, the problem is that I need them now to check some of my steps while I am dancing across a page or a blog entry.

I know that I should have put them on the shelf of the computer desk, bud I did not do that. As  a results, I have to find the books again before I can place them on the shelf with my CDs. I should find the books either today or  tomorrow because I am not leaving the house until they are found. I realized long ago that sometimes dancing with words requires a periodic refresher course.

Sunday Thoughts on Blog Entries

I realized this week that if I do not make a blog entry of a morning then it is almost impossible to make one in the evening. In Las Vegas’ triple digit temperatures it gets too hot in the afternoon for me to turn on the computers. The temperatures do not cool down until about 7:30 or 8:00 PM and by that time; I am ready to go to bed.

These are reasons and I have to figure out a way to work around the problem. I have to admit that I have not done a good job working around it this last week. Perhaps I am worrying too much. I have a tendency to worry or rather to obsess over an issue.

I think I need to relax. I think I need to write what I can write and not worry about anything else. There is nothing wrong with posting every-other-day, which are about four posts a week. I know that I should be satisfied with doing that, but for some reason I am not.

I am beginning to wonder if this post makes any sense at all. My thoughts are scattered and that does not contribute to a good post. A good post should focus on one issue and not ramble. Since I am beginning to ramble, I am going to post this and do another activity.

Tuesday's Timed Writing Exercise: Scatter Thoughts

It is Tuesday, so I set the oven time for fifteen minutes. My thoughts are scattered and I cannot decide on a blog entry. I know I have a great deal of writing to accomplish. I also have to clip coupons so that I can go to the store on Wednesday.

I am home alone. The security screen is locked. I still cannot think of anything to write about. I will continue this blog entry until the oven timer goes off. That would be a good idea for a poem, The Oven Timer would make a good title. Oven timers are good for other things beside baking. I do not need the timer for cooking because I use a microwave. The only thing I use the timer for is writing.

It helps me to write when I use the timer. I am attempting to break some bad writing habits and if I time my writing then I have to continue without going  back and editing. I seem to want to edit my material while I am writing instead of waiting until I am finished. It takes longer to write a story if I go back and edit every few lines or paragraphs. Using an oven timer also helps me come up with story ideas.

I think I may have sit the timer for five minutes too long this time. The next time I do a timed blog entry I will sit the timer for ten minutes instead of fifteen. If the entry is longer I can always write longer. Perhaps add a poem to the entry.

An oven timer
My thoughts become less scattered
Using a timer.

I bought an oven timer today

I bought an oven timer today. I do not need it to use in cooking because I use a microwave for everything I have to bake. I bought the timer to use when I write. I have thought about this for a couple of weeks, but today I finally decided that I needed a timer when I do timed writing. I also use it when I compose other things like blog entries or stories.

I need something to give me a deadline and the timer works. It allows me to write within a time limit of 60, 30, or 10 minutes. A timer helps me focus on the subject because I have to write within the limit and therefore I cannot get distracted. I have not attempted to write for more then ten minutes, but I only bought the timer today. I may set the timer to fifteen or twenty minutes rather then ten minutes when writing a blog entry, but that depends on the subject I choose.

One of my writing problems is distractions and another is deleting words when I have to make a corrections. If I have a time limit, I do not have time to delete words when I make a mistake. By using a timer, I have to continue writing and once the timer goes off, I go back to make the corrections. I hope a timer works to correct this specific issue because it causes me to waste more time when writing then write. I will give myself a couple of weeks to see how well this approach to the problems works.

Mundane Monday: A long and prolific day

This morning I went to have my eyes checked. The appointment was at 9:30 and I did not leave the doctor’s office until about 11:00. After that I made another stop, which it turned out was not necessary, but I did not know this at the time.

Anyway, I did not get home until about 1:00 PM and then I took a nap. I did not start writing until after supper. Despite the fact that I got a late start, I got a lot accomplished. In addition, to writing three blog entries I review several stories on writing.com.

I did not check my e-mail or the bank accounts. Usually I obsess over the unaccomplished tasks, but this evening I am not worried about them. It is nice not to be worried about something.

Right now, I am just passing time until the virus scan starts. It is set to begin about 11:30 PM and I want it to begin tonight. I have tried changing the time, but the program will not let me. Therefore, I will stay up and write until the program begins scanning my computer. Maybe I will check one of my e-mail accounts or say some prayers while I am waiting for the virus scan to begin.

If I turn the computer off before the scan starts, it will run when I turn the machine on tomorrow. However, I would rather this program ran this evening so it does not interfere with my working online tomorrow.

I forgot a character’s nam

I am writing a series of blog entries for a contest on writing.com. The entries compose a story written in serial form. Today’s entry is the last one in the series. When I began writing it I realized I had forgotten a character’s name. I had to go back to a previous entry to find her name.

I know it is a result of stress and not short-term memory lose, at least I hope stress is the cause. It is scary to forget a character’s name, especially the main character. It is an especially scary experience for me because my mother has Alzheimer’s disease and I am her caregiver.

I know there are other symptoms of Alzheimer’s besides short-term memory lose. I have not shown any of the other symptoms, so this incident with the character’s name is just a brain hiccup. Still it is upsetting because the first I thought when it happened was Alzheimer’s disease. My second thought was relax and do not panic.

Getting back into my routine

I used to have a routine, a series of actions I did each day when I got online. I would check the bank accounts, PayPal, writing.com, SocialSpark, Sponzai, PayPerPost, InPostLinks, and Goviral Network. After checking those websites, I would make one or more blog entries. Somehow, I got out of that routine and, as a result, I am having difficulty making blog entries.

I did not always check those websites in the morning. Sometimes I checked them in the afternoon. Sometimes I checked them in the evening, but I always logged into each one at least once a day. I need to get back into the routine of checking them everyday. If I check each website everyday, I do not miss opportunities and I make a blog entry everyday.

In some cases, a routine is a good practice. It helps keep me in touch with my finances. It helps me find moneymaking opportunities. It helps me achieve my word count goals because it encourages me to write everyday. A routine helps me the goals I at the beginning of the year. A routine helps me focus on achievement rather then on worrying. A routine helps me remember where I left off when I encounter interruptions.

I Ran out of Coffee yesterday

It feels odd sitting at the computer composing a blog entry without a cup of hot black coffee sitting beside me. I have two coffee pots and a coffee grinder, but no coffee. I ran out of coffee yesterday, so this morning I had hot tea with my breakfast. I also had a cup of hot tea while reading the newspaper.

A cup of hot tea does not satisfy the desire for coffee. Reading a newspaper without a cup of hot coffee just does not feel right. I know it is simply my perception. Subconsciously I know there is no difference between reading with a cup of hot coffee on the table or a cup of hot tea. Reading a newspaper while drinking a cup of hot coffee brings back memories of my father and grandfather.

One of my earliest memories is sitting on my father’s lap while he read the comics. Dad always drank a cup of hot coffee when he read the comics to me. My grandfather always drank coffee with every meal. Another fond memory is my first cup of coffee, which my grandfather made for me. I know he put more cream and sugar in the up then coffee, but that did not make any difference because Grandpa let me drink coffee with him.

I ran out of coffee yesterday and I probably will not be able to get more for several days. I do not remember my father running out of coffee. I do not remember my grandfather running out of coffee.

Evening Writing is difficult

I decided make blog entries at evening or night because my days are full of care giving and housekeeping. However, I have discovered a situation that makes it a bit difficult. The issues are subjects and themes; I have difficulty finding a subject in the evening and at night. Another issue is being tired and stressed.

Sometimes I open a blank document and stare at the screen. Looking at the white page is like looking at a field of new fallen snow. You look at the unmarked snow and see nothing. No animal tracks and no human tracks. The field of snow goes on into eternity without anything to indicate there is any life in the vicinity. That is what it is like to look at the page of a new document waiting for me to type something onto the page.

A blank document is as scary as a unmarked field of snow. You know that if you remain staring at the snow it might blind you, but you cannot stop looking at it. Looking at an empty page is similar. You stare at the page and hope that you can think of something to write. You stare at the snowfield and hope that you will see the track of a wolf or a rabbit.

I need to rewrite yesterday’s blog entry

I just reread yesterday’s blog entry and found too many redundancies. I should rewrite it, so that there are fewer redundancies. I suspect that is one of my weaknesses, which is remedies by rewriting. I have to admit that I did not do a good job of describing my garage roof.

The shingles are simulated wood; the manufacturer created them to look like wood. Seeing them from a distance they resemble a shake shingle roof (I thinks that is what they were supposed to do). When Mom and I moved into the house, we had the roof replace. We had no choice it had to be replaced and every 4th of July I give thanks because I do not have to worry if the neighbors’ illegal fireworks land on my roof.

When I write a story or poem, I usually let the piece lay for an hour or so before submitting or posting. However, with blog entries I simply write and post. I check my spelling and syntax; after that, I post the entry. When I read the post on Wednesday, I did not notice the redundancy, but today it jumped out at me, like a cat pouncing on a toy mouse.

I need a day off

When I work outside the home, I get two days off; however, lately I have worked at home and online, so I do not take a day off. I think I need to start taking a day off because I just cannot handle working seven days without a break.

A day off does not mean I stop writing on that day. Writing is only part of what I do online I also do surveys. Therefore, on my day off I will not do surveys or make blog entries. I may or may not work on a poem, short story or novel.

I am not sure whether to take off Saturday or Sunday, maybe I will just wing it week by week and see which day is best. I could rotate my days off, one week take Saturday and the next Sunday. Since I do not find many ad opportunities on the weekends, one of those days would be good to take off. I also think I need to start taking an afternoon nap because I get sleepy about 2:30 or 3:00 PM.

Writing the Adventure of Life

Life is an adventure. Life is a daily struggle to find happiness. Life is interesting. Life is a spiritual adventure for the spirit. Composing blog entries is writing the adventure of life.

My mother suffers from Alzheimer's Disease and has short-term memory lose. Everyday is a new frustration or discovery for me. I am my mother's caregiver. I am considering writing a series of essays on this subject.

I think the first essay in this series will cover Mom and the cats. Mom worries that the cats are hunger, so she feeds them. Mom feeds the cats dry cereal and I feed them dry cat food. This morning when I checked their feeding bowls I found dry cereal on top of their regular cat food. My cats will not eat cereal, so I had to throw away the food in the dishes.

I put more cat food in their dishes this morning. However, I have to do something about Mom feeding them the cereal. Before I go to work today, I will either take the food dishes up or hide them from Mom. Since Mom gets angry when she thinks someone is criticizing her, I cannot talk to her about the food the cats eat. Taking the food up during the day is probably the best idea.

Saturday Morning Writing in Las Vegas

It is Saturday morning; I have a busy day ahead and a busy week behind. I am feeling stressed, but I am writing anyway. Writing helps the stress because it lets me focus and vent. I enjoy writing even when stressed and I have other things to do.

I am going to have to give up a few things though because there is just so much to do. Mom wants to help, but she just does not seem to get anything she wants accomplished. I think the main problem is Alzheimer’s disease. Mom always has things she wants to do, but never gets around to doing them.

I do not know how much I am going to accomplish around the house the next couple of weeks. I will do what I can do; I will do the important things and get the other stuff done when I can. No matter how much housecleaning I have to do, I am still going to write. I will keep the computer on and a document open. This will allow me to write between washing dishes and changing cat litter.

I still have websites to check for ad opportunities, but I am going to check those Monday through Friday. If I can get opportunities on those days, I will take them. Right now, I am working outside the house eight hours a day, seven days a week. I think that is my schedule for the next two or three weeks.

Since I am working in the afternoons, I have to work online in the mornings. I work online when I can and I post when I can. I will attempt to post everyday during the week, at least one ad post a day or every other day depending on the opportunities.

Writing at my Wits End

I have a virus problem, which just started today. I am going to spend the rest of the day attempting to correct the problem. Every time I think the issue solved, I get a warning from my resident shield that there is a problem. I have ran the AVG virus check at least twice and each time it says the problem is found, remove, and healed. Then I go online and the resident shield warns of the detection of a virus.

My next option is to run Spybot – Search & Destroy. After that I am not sure what I will do. I hope Spybot takes care of the problem, but I am not sure it will because I think the virus has attached itself to Explorer and if that is the case, I am not sure what to do next. I may have to down another browser or download Explorer 8 again. I will spend the rest of the day attempting to solve this problem.

Once I have solved the virus problem, I have to go on to the next issue. The next issue is completing my edition of the writing.com fantasy newsletter. I already have three paragraphs written, so I need to write only one more paragraph and chose three or four stories and a contest to feature in the editor’s picks.

I am composing this entry off line, with the intention of posting it some time today (July 15, 2010). This, of course, depends on whether or not I solve the virus problem.

Friday morning writing

It is Friday, July 9, Mom is doing good this morning. She took her meds this morning without too much protesting. Mom has decided she does not need to take meds, so she protests taking her medication saying, "I am not a sicky." Since Mom is doing well this morning, I can write longer because when is has a good day she does all most everything for herself and does not lose too many items

Mom enjoys watching me sit at my computer. She enjoys watching me write and play Spider Solitary. Therefore, whenever I can write while Mom is watching I write. Today started out as a good day and I am typing this entry directly into this blog. Mom likes to see me compose my blog entries in this manner.

Tomorrow I am working outside the house for about nine and one-half hour. I talked to the adult care agency I work through and they will fine someone to sit with Mom. The last time Mom had someone sitting with her, she did not get angry with me. I wish she could stay alone, but since she has Alzheimer's disease that is not an option.

Dealing with Alzheimer’s disease

Late in 2009, the doctor diagnosed Mom with Alzheimer's disease. Short-term memory lose and anger are part of Alzheimer patient's issues. Mom gets angry when she thinks I am critizing her, so I have to be extremely careful about what I say and how I say it. Mom also forgets where she places items and where stuff goes when she puts it away. There are other issues, as well, many more issues then I can write about in a single blog entry.

Mom's short-term memory loses makes opening cabinets and drawers an adventure. I never know when I open a drawer or cupboard what I am going to find. For example, I opened the storage unit under the stovetop and found two cans of tomato juice and a can of apple juice. The tomato juice I opened and Mom drank them. The apple juice is still down there waiting for me to open it.

I noticed this morning, that Mom has taken her partial dentures out of her mouth. I have no idea where she put them. the last time she took them out I found them on the floor beside her bed, but I have to find them, wash them, and get her to put them back in her mouth. I think she takes them out because they hurt her gums; however, I cannot take her to the dentist without the dentures.

Once I find the dentures and determine why Mom takes them out of her mouth then I can explain the situation to the dentist. Perhaps he can make some suggestion concerning this issue. Unfortunately, Mom will not use any type of denture adhesive.

Changing my online work schedule

I enjoy composing blog entries online because it stretches my ability. It takes concentration to write an entry online because I have to focus on proper grammar and spelling, especially when writing an ad. Lately, I have encountered numerous interruptions due to being my mother’s caregiver. This does not mean I am going to stop working online or composing blog entries online.

I have decided to change my online work schedule. Instead of working during the day, when Mom needs the most care I am going to start working in the evenings, at night, and early morning. This schedule should allow me to compose at least one blog entry while I am online. The rest, I will write off line, which is how I am writing this entry, with the plan to post when I get back online.

I do not plan to give up working online; I simply have to change the schedule. I do not know how well this new schedule will work, but it is worth a try. I will work the new schedule for the next three months and then decide if I have to change again.

I am not a happy camper

I am going to attempt to make this blog entry directly into the blog. I am not sure how well it will work since my browser is acting up. That is why I am not a happy camper. Actually, in this case I am not a happy surfer.

I attempt to access a website and it takes the browser several minutes to get me there. Sometimes if I place the curse into the address window and pressing return helps, but not all the time. Sometimes I get an error message or the gate times out. In either case, I have to start all over again. While I was typing this entry, I got the message there was a problems saving it, so I attempted to save again and it worked.

In addition, to the slowness I am having difficulties tab browser. I enjoy tab browsing when my browser does it properly. Sometimes the browser works fine, but that is rare. This situation began occurring about a week ago. I do not know what is causing the problem I just want it fixed. I just love technology when it works properly. I am going to end this entry, while there is still a chance that I can post it properly.

Midweek Reflections

It's a typical Wednesday morning, if any morning in my life can be typical. This is trash collection day in my neighborhood, so I rolled the plastic trashcan to the curb about 6:30. The garbage trucks came about 7:30, which is earlier then normal.

Yesterday, I had another ultrasound on my left breast and I still don't know whether the mass is benign or malignant. The appointment was for 3:30 PM, therefore I didn't get back home until about 5:00. I checked my voice mail and, of course, someone called. I don't know who, because it was too late to return any calls. I get the message today and deal with it.

Instead of taking messages, I sit down at the computer and wrote yesterday evening. I finished one poem for a contest. I'll submit it today, after I complete my blog entries. I still have to go to the grocery store, but I'm going to wait until this afternoon. The only thing I have to get is a bag of dry cat food and a loaf or two of bread.

I have a description to finish and post today. Then I need to review any other writing items and upcoming deadlines. I think that is all I have to do today, unless something comes in snail mail that I have to deal with. I think I'll use the "typical Wednesday morning" line in a story.