The Big Date

The Big Date

This is the big date, the date I had planned so carefully so what is missing. The date I had planned so carefully without going to the Divine Essence in prayer, the blessing of the Beloved is missing. No matter what I do without the blessing of God, of the Divine Essence nothing can go right. I does not matter now how I try to retrieve what is left of the night, the blessing of God is not here making everything come out right. It is amazing, how one little prayer before starting a new project will affect the spirit of the project and the project’s outcome. Now that everything has fallen apart and I am left standing alone in the dark, I turn to the Beloved; I turn to the Divine Essence in prayer and ask forgiveness for my egotistical belief that without the blessing of God anything can turn out right.

I fall on my knees and ask forgiveness; as I speak the words, I feel the presence of the Ancient of Days. Midnight and I hear the wind rising, I see the stars shining and I feel the presence of the Holy Spirit. The words I intone are not my own, but taken from the sacred scriptures. Memorized over decades of not knowing where to turn as I read the prayers and the sacred writings looking for an answer; now the words come back to me, I repeat them and they give me comfort. I repeat them and they contain the answers to my dilemma. I am not alone in the darkness, I am by myself, but I am not alone. The spirit of God, the Divine Essence, and the Ancient of Days is there whispering comfort into the ears of my spirit.

(14 Mulk 162 B.E.)